Thinking Out Loud

I know I should optimize my titles for search, but since my titles are part of my art, I cannot compromise. You see, I love a title that is clever and nuanced. For today's post, I vacillated between "Write it Out" and "Right it Out." Both have a meaningful application. Through writing, I come to know what is right for me. And as I discover additional rights in life, I return to my pad and write it out. It's a beautiful, self-reinforcing cycle. I was texting with a dear friend today and she confessed her lack of confidence in certain areas of her life, particularly regarding her decision to leave her faith culture. We were both raised in the same religion by devout parents, and this past weekend our church held one of its large conferences. I didn't even remember that it was that time of the year and I was busily engaged at a work conference in a distant city. I have no idea what was covered in their sessions and I can honestly say, I do not care. Sh...

I don’t know if you’re like me or not, but I was born into the one and only “true” religion of God. I spent my entire life studying and living the principles and teachings of my faith. I knew the doctrine, and I believed it to be true. Until I didn’t. The road to the unraveling of my faith is a rather long one—definitely another article for another day--but suffice it to say, I began studying other religions and realized that all of them contained beautiful truths. I felt as uplifted and inspired while reading their scriptures as I did reading mine. I understood why some referred to religion as a “faith culture” for I was now aware that had I been born and raised in a different religion, I’d have believed that religious tradition to be true. I came to see religions as merely vehicles leading us back to God. Surely God didn’t care whether his children drove jalopies or Jaguars so long as they were moving along the superhighway back to Him. Or could it be her? Or perhaps there wasn’t ju...

Happy Thanksgiving! Having one day a year where you focus on what you are grateful for is good, but for me, living in gratitude daily, is better. Did I inherit gratitude or learn it? I have no desire to engage in that debate. I'm just grateful I'm grateful. I was reflecting this morning on my newfound beliefs, or perhaps my recently discarded beliefs, and I realized that if I had to choose one changed belief that that has most dramatically changed me, it would have to be my belief that people are good. Yep, I no longer believe in Satan or sin. And even though I don't believe the Bible to be any truer than any other book, I do love how the author had his God declare all his creations "Good."  No one is evil. Yes, some people commit horrible, nasty acts, but not because they are evil, but because they are not well. Hurting people hurt others. This realization is far more empowering than believing that some people are simply corrupted. We can help heal hurting...

Today was full of fun reinforcements and revelations. I belong to a private Facebook group of former Mormons and there is always interesting information being shared. I enjoy reading the experiences of other members and I find comfort in knowing I'm not alone. This weekend several members of the community shared posts about an email they have received from the church asking them to complete a survey on why they left the church. Here is what one member shared: Did anyone else receive a survey by email today from the church? I guess I’m still on their mass email list. Normally I would have just deleted it, but it said if I filled it out I would get a $10 Amazon gift card, so I decided to hurry and complete it. 😂 😜 It had some general factual questions, but then it asked some deep hard questions. Basically, it is trying to figure out who and why people are leaving the church and what they can do to prevent it from happening even more.  They are trying to see if t...

So I started writing a book and man if I'm already bored of it, what does that say about any one else wanting to read it? I feel like I don't really need to write a book, but just a bunch of blog posts. For me, it's so freaking hard to write a book peice meal. Just when I get into the groove, I get interrupted. If I'm going to ever write a book, I need to go to a deserted island where I can have 30 days of uninterrupted, totally focused writing time. It takes too much time for me to get into the flow to only write for 30 minutes per day. By the time I warm up, it's time to wrap up. That's not optimal for quality writing. But on a fun note, I started reading a most excellent book by Richard Dawkins called The Magic of Reality . Rather than allow religion and myth to promulgate untruths, Dawkins presents scientific truths to answer some of the most pressing human questions--questions concerning creation, evolution, life and death, and more. It's freakin...

I won't take no more of your bullshit lies I got hands so full of your stinkin' pies Times are changin' and I realize I hate these patties in my hand Their smell offends me I'm taking a stand I refuse to carry this crap around I'm settin' it down upon the ground where shit belongs and where shit will stay It's time for me to make my own way pushin' all these bulls aside confidently watch me stride through these pastures we call life trustin' my gut believin' my reason followin' my heart season after season and as I go, this I now know Every time I encounter shit I don't pick it up I don't take hold of it I see it precisely for what it is I raise my sights and I step over it.

I had a revelation about reincarnation in the shower yesterday. I do not find it difficult to believe in reincarnation after this life because I have experienced reincarnation in this life several times. Two of which I'm particularly aware. First, in an effort to not mince words, perhaps what I'm about to describe isn't technically the meaning of reincarnation, but more along the lines of reinvention, however, since both instances encapsulate the death of a world, accompanied by the rebirth and remaking of a new life, I'm rolling comfortably with reincarnation. The day my world died is how I've often verbalized the shattering of my first marriage. I'll spare you the details because frankly, it's not important nor unique to me. We all suffer disappointment, betrayal, and loss at some point in life, and since none of us are what we once were, it really feels unfair, and small, to recount and belabor past perceived offenses. What I describe below shall, I ...

Look, if you want to move people you've got to share your story. In order to share your story, you've got to know your story! So, what's your story? I'm asking because I just spent 2 hours today in a board meeting where I spoke frankly to the non-profit about their lack of a story. They have their annual giving campaign coming up and they are once again asking people to open up their pocketbooks and shell out their hard earned cash. Well, if you don't have a compelling story to share about why I should give you my hard-earned money and what kind of impact my donation is going to have, I'm going to be less inclined to donate. But, tell me what you are about, tell me why you care and what you are doing to make the world a better place, and tell me how I can join you in your mission, and you betcha I'll share some dough. I want to help people who are helping others and I'm always looking for a good cause. So what's your story? This principle does...

I had never heard of musical hallucinations until I started reading  Musicophilia . I guess I've heard of people who claim to hear choirs of angels, but I, like them, thought this was some signification that they were chosen of God or spiritually blessed. Musical hallucinations, however, are neurological. They have nothing to do with divine signification and everything to do with skiwampus neurological pathways. Musicophilia  is written by renowned neurosurgeon Oliver Sacks, made famous by his earlier book  Awakenings .  In fact, if you've never seen the  movie , I highly recommend it. It's a true story featuring Robert de Niro and Robin Williams. I loved it the first time I saw it, and now that I'm enthralled with the brain, and our relatively pygmy understanding of it, I relish it even more. Witnessing the radical transformation of the lives of the patients who received the miracle drug L-dopa, gets me excited for the day when we have er...

Check it out. I've never used drugs, and I have no intention of ever trying them either. I have heard the term "tripping out," but until Ram Dass explained the experience in his book " Be Here Now "  of using psychedelics, I had no idea what it meant. Ram Dass, formerly Professor Richard Alpert, became famous for his clinical study of psychedelics. He and several other Harvard professors experimented with using drugs to stimulate spiritual experiences and attain higher levels of consciousness. Professor Alpert wrote extensively about his "trips" under the influence and how his journeys led him to greater understanding. I really enjoyed reading his travelogue. It was fascinating to hear about the effects LDS, psyclobin, mushrooms, etc. had on his own and others' consciousness and awareness. Ram Dass explained how he learned more in 1 minute under the influence of psychedelics than he had come to comprehend in his entire 35 years. He had ma...

I'm grateful this morning for the Stoics, particularly Cato's quote about why he rarely spoke. His reply: I speak only when I'm sure that what I have to say is better not left unsaid.  Cato's quote reminded me of the Jewish wisdom called The Three Pillars of Speech.  Basically, you should only speak if what you are about to say passes the following: 1) Is it true 2) Is it kind 3) Is it necessary If what you are about to say cannot pass the 3 pillars, then don't say it! These are wise words that I'm constantly trying to remember and apply. Additionally, I loved many other Stoic teachings that graced my ears as I climbed my triple hills this morning on my road bike. It was the first time this year that I pulled out Doc and pounded the pavement. Another thought I enjoyed was Marcus Aurelias's analogy of the family banquet. He cautioned against the impertinence of reaching across the table to grab the dish of food you want or serving yourself up hea...

I'm thankful today for my mindfulness meditation mentoring group. It's my cohort that meets bi-monthly to discuss our Power of Awareness  course. Several in my group were also accepted into the 2-year Mindfulness and Meditation Teacher Certification Program so I'm looking forward to getting to know many of them better over the next few years. Anyhow, today we had some extra time to discuss whatever we wanted so I decided to take advantage of the cumulative wisdom and asked if anyone else had found their mindfulness and meditation practice to be a doorway leading them out of their current faith culture. I wanted to know how others in our group were able to negotiate the awareness that there is no one right way and every religion is fundamentally the same?  I was especially eager to get everyone's take considering we have a Quaker, a Jew, a Buddhist, a 12-Step Devotee, a Shaman, and who knows what else, in our group. I am keen to know how they are able to remain devout...

Sometimes I just get strung out on the beauty of certain words in a certain order. I mean how beautiful and paradoxical is the pathless path? It not only sounds poetic, it feels true. What if there is no one right way? What if all roads do indeed lead to Rome? I can't help but think that there is some kind of plan, but that may just be because of my cultural indoctrination. I was born believing in a divine plan and it made sense simply because that is what I was told from the day I was born. Quite naturally, whatever a child is told will make sense, until the child grows and starts to question what they've been told. I guess some children never question till they are adults and others accept whatever they are told. I never had any questions or doubts till I--like Truman from the Truman Show--started seeing that everything I had been taught and told was possibly not true or real. That realization is exhilirating and scary. If what you have always believed is not necessaril...

This post was going to be titled, The Wizard of Oz, but since I plan to talk about the consuming search for God, I figured the title should be  The Wizard of God. Now I haven't seen the Wizard of Oz for many years, but if memory serves, there is this young girl named Dorothy who ends up in Munchkin Land after a Tornado steals her away from Kansas. Her house crushed the Wicked Witch of the East, which causes the Wicked Witch of the West to swear vengeance. Fortunately, Galinda the Good Witch bequeaths magical red slippers to Dorothy, tells her to follow the Yellow Brick Road to the Land of Oz, where the Wizard will help her return to her home. Along her way to Oz, Dorothy meets many friends. The Tin Man, Scarecrow, and the Lion, whom she convinces to come with her to Oz so that they too can receive their hearts' desires. In the end, the Wizard turns out to be a ruse and Dorothy realizes she has the power to get home on her own. Equally important, the Tin Man, Lion and Scarecro...

I was reading an article by Amrit Desai wherein he discussed optimal disillusionment. A few paragraphs really caught my eye: We tend to believe that love ends when dreams are demolished. In reality, the shattering of dreams is the opportunity for the emergence of true love. . . in these situations, what is perceived to be the failure of the relationship is, in reality, the failure of the dream . . those who are committed to spiritual growth are determined to use the failure of the dream as an opportunity to enter into an authentic relationship.  We all let each other down. Institutions and organizations, like people, can disappoint. Ideally, we get let down softly, gently. This is what psychologists call "optimal disillusionment." It's a gradual process. Not as painful as say "ripping off a band-aid," or some huge, shocking revelation. I like this idea. Burn down the dream so you can build on reality. Since reality is the truth, why would you want to buil...

I came across an excellent technique for handling difficult emotions taught by renowned psychoanalyst Stephen Cope. The 5 step process is called Riding the Wave and is based on  prana and  the concept of where attention goes energy flows. Step 1: Breathe    The softest of stuff in the world Penetrates quickly the hardest. Insubstantial, it enters Where no room is.                                ~Lao Tzu When we consciously redirect our attention to breath, we immediately enter the world of energy, of movement, of arising and passing away, of constant change. There is no distance to travel to this world. We are right there. According to Stephen Cope: Since the breath is the switch that integrates the emotional-prana body with the physical body, conscious breathing opens parts of the body that may have long been shut off from the life force. And when the save of breath ...

I'm trying to decide what the balance between transcending and embracing should be? I mean if our purpose is to fully embrace and experience life, then do we really want to transcend our experiences? I would think it would be better to relish the experience rather than try to escape or overcome it? For example, when I gashed open my shin, I told myself it wasn't pain. I used my mind to "transcend" the experience. I told myself that the surge of sensation I was feeling in my shin was simply that, sensation. I was really amazed at how effective this method was in helping me deal with the pain. But now, I'm wondering if the same effect could be had by coming at the pain another way? What if, in this shin situation, instead of seeking to minimize the pain, I had instead moved toward the pain? Could looking pain in the eyes and embracing it with open curiosity have been equally effective in helping me deal with the pain? Why do we immediately assume pain is bad and t...